Life, Updates and Achievements.

Hey there, remember me? Nope I didn't think so. I haven't done a post in a very long time, and to those of you who love reading my posts and keep telling me to do more I apologise, I have been meaning to do one for some time now I just haven't got round to it. I'm lazy haha.

So what's been going on? well quite a lot actually, I didn't even realise just how far a long things had come until I read my first ever post which was January 2014, a whole year and a half away almost. Time goes so quickly now I'm older and maybe because I'm enjoying life more.

In that post I set myself goals to complete for the year, they were as follows:

Goals for 2014: 

1. Get a bus on my own (Haven't done that in 4 years) 
2. Start driving
3. Lose weight 
4. Work on going to college or getting into work
5. Say YES to more things and not let opportunities slide.

I'm actually quite surprised reading them, I mean the first goal I honestly thought there was no way in hell's chance I'd be able to get on a bus by myself again, but I did it! Not only did I accomplish that, I am now a regular bus user, I rarely get panicky or anxious getting the bus now and that's just crazy to me. Occasionally I get days where I struggle and don't feel like doing it but that's bound to happen, the difference is I don't give up, I try again another day.

I even go out on my own more, I don't mean crazy nights out, but to the shops, or appointments etc, I do it on my OWN. 

I got the train up to Lincoln on my own to meet my sister at uni once as well, (which I'm sure I will be doing again sometime soon).

I haven't started driving yet, but that's fine I have plans to start, It's just taking that first step right? I'm not sure when that will be, but It will be someday.

Losing weight, the bane of my life, *sigh*. I've lost a few pounds, nothing major, but I do eat so much better now, I use to be a huge coca-cola addict, I was drinking maybe 1L a day, and cutting that down was not easy, The headaches were awful, I was constantly tired and exhausted, I was so grumpy, It took a while, I'm still not coke free ( haha doesn't that sound dodgy) but I now drink fizzy drinks with sweeteners rather than sugar and I don't drink a whole lot of them neither, I've replaced them with, Smoothies/Juices, (Thanks nutribullet) and Water (Still and Flavoured). I've replaced all my carbs for wholemeal ones, I eat more protein, and I rarely snack now. I go on walks with my little dog, Charlie, and I do some workouts at home, I may not have lost a lot of weight but the main thing is I feel so much better in myself, mentally and physically.

I didn't go back to college as I decided it just wasn't for me, so I started a course online in veterinary nursing, which is what I've wanted to do for a while now, It's so interesting, I've almost finished and then I'll have my final test, Once I pass I'm going to ask around my local vets for voluntary work to gain practical experience, as of course the online course is only the theory side. 

Say YES to more, this has always been a difficult one, deep down I want to say Yes, I want to just not give a fuck and be happy and have fun, but sometimes the mind doesn't allow that. However I have made a bit more of an effort to not turn down opportunities, like when I get invited out I try my best to go and have fun, most of the time I do, sometimes not so much, Having a panic attack in the middle of whether spoons wasn't very nice, but everyone was so supportive and understanding. Took me a while to get back out there, but I did it, and I shall continue to do so. 

Overall I feel more positive, I try to not let negative people get in my way now, I just block them out, why should I have someone around me if they make me feel so bad, it's just not worth it. 

I still have a way to go, but i'm getting higher up on my little ladder :)

Let me know if you prefer these kind of life update posts, or do you like my beauty and random related ones more? 

I'll try not leave it so long before my next post. (No promises, I know what I'm like ha)

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My Internet "Dating" Experience.

So It's been a while since I've been bothered to even look for a boyfriend or have any kind of a relationship, partly because I'm happy just by myself, I don't need some guy invading my space, but also because I honestly haven't been at all bothered, until recently. As crazy as it seems i'm almost 22 and although that is still young, I'm starting to feel like an "Adult" scary!! Majority of the people I went to school with, are married or in long term relationships with children, woah hold your horses there before you get ahead of yourselves! I still feel too young for that, but part of me is a tad jealous as they all seem so grown up and happy with their families and I don't really have anything. Now of course I'm not going to go out there grab any old guy get married and have kids, that's not me at all (much to my mother's disgust lol) and I don't even know if I want kids. The point is my life is passing by so quickly, and it would be nice to be able to share certain experiences with someone other than my cat! Although I do love him! So I thought about joining a couple online dating sites, not thinking anything of it, just as laugh, but my god, what an experience.

So I've come to the conclusion I'm either extremely naive or guys these days are just full on perverted (not all guys of course), maybe it's a bit of both. I'm not even exaggerating when I say 9 out of 10 guys on these sites are just interested in sex, I kind of knew you got weirdo's online and I can never imagine having a full on relationship with someone who I met through the internet as it creeps me out a bit, but I was truly shocked at the amount of guys with in seconds of messaging me were asking me for nude pics or asking me sexual questions, like seriously does that even work? Of course I just deleted them and ignored the messages but It did make me wonder is that what these kind of sites are used for? Call me old fashioned but I'm not into the one night stands, friends with benefits, sleeping with strangers, whatever you want to call it thing, It's just something I don't feel comfortable with, it grosses me out. I have nothing against people who do but for me it's wrong on so many levels. I know nowadays a lot of girls are just as bad as the guys when it comes to sleeping around, and maybe it's encouraged guys more, they feel it's okay to ask inappropriate questions because they sometimes get a response from it. I can safely say I'm not going to be talking/meeting guys online from these so called dating sites, or should I say "sexing sites".

I wasn't sure whether to do this or not, but I wanted to share some of the things I got asked as I had a laugh (mainly out of shock) at the balls of some of these guys. They were pretty upfront.

A 19 yr old: Send me a pic of you naked plz.
( I deleted)

A 51 yr old: Hey, you have beautiful eyes, Are you attracted to older men?
Me: Thank you. I guess, It depends on how old.
51 yr old: I'm 51. Your profile says your 5ft, Small girls turn me on, what are your sexiest features?
Me: Oh, you're quite a lot older than me then.
51 yr old: Yes, I'm very experienced I could teach you a lot, What are your sexiest spots?
( I deleted) Don't get me wrong, I don't mind older guys, but when they are older than your Dad that's just weird lmao.

32 yr old: I wish you were here.
Me: Why?
32 yr old: I'm feeling very horny.
( I deleted)

19 yr old: Send me a picture please, your profile pic won't show.
I send a picture (Of my FACE!)
19 yr old: I like, show me more of you with less clothes.
Me: No, you're alright.
19 yr old: Why?
Me: Because I don't even know you, I'm not into that.
19 yr old: Oh well you're not even that hot anyway. bye

25 yr old: What turns you on? You look like a girl who likes anal.
Me: Are you actually serious?
25 yr old: Yeah, I guess you're not into that then.
(I deleted)

22 yr old: Hey beautiful, fancy having cyber sex, would really turn me on.
Me: No..
(I deleted)

So there you have it, some of the messages I got, Atleast now you know not to do online dating. What a weird bunch of people.....or am I just old fashioned and naive? How can any girl find those kinds of messages attractive seriously. I'd love to know what your opinions are.

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