What a year it's been...

So.... It's been a while, just over 2 years to be exact. I sort of lost touch with this blogging thing when life took over, but here I am, once again, writing another post.

Well to be honest I don't really know where to start, 2017 has been such an amazing year for me, probably the best of all, well at least for a very lonnnnng time. Towards the end of 2016 from October time I had a bit of a mental breakdown and felt as if my life was once again spiraling out of my control...most of you would be shocked to hear this as i'm very good at hiding these things but to close friends and family they will know what I mean...but that's a completely different story for maybe a different post ha.

Anyway back to the point of this record.

Let's start of with January...

Not going to lie I wasn't really in the mood for the whole new year thing, I felt stuck, lost and miserable, thinking "here we ago again another year to pass me by with nothing good to come of it"...I know so pessimistic!
....but little did I know this was to be the start of something amazing.
It all started when this guy, who just randomly added me on Facebook one night and I know what you're thinking oh god haven't we all heard this story before, but it's a little different, you see, this guy, I sort of knew him, he was the brother of one of my work colleagues and I had heard many a stories about him, not going to lie quite a few of them weren't so great ha and never in my wildest dreams would I have thought we would hit it off.

To begin with I was quite guarded, for obvious reasons, one being he didn't have the best reputation and the second being I didn't want to be the girl that everyone at work gossiped about because of our relationship. so we spent days and nights chatting, a lot of flirting on his part.... and I found myself starting to really like him, however there was still that wall up and after one arranged date (in which I cancelled on last minute haha) his brother (my work colleague) and my mum convinced me to just give it a shot, so that I did, a few days after I fell ill with a sickness bug so I had to cancel our second meeting which I was gutted about but he sent me a card, a bear and a chocolate rose and left it on my doorstep to cheer me up and we literally talked all night! He is the sweetest guy. I felt like a teenager again. I could feel myself falling for this guy and slowly but surely within a month or so after many late nights talking and seeing each other twice a week, we became a couple.

James and I

Since becoming a couple, James and I have been and done so many fun and wonderful things this year and we have started off our first year together with lots of lovely memories.
We spent a lot of the times going to the Hunstanton, maybe because after our first time there, we officially became an "item". I particularly remember one night, It was a bank holiday Monday, end of August about 5pm I had just finished work and he rang me up and literally said be ready in 10 minutes I'm taking you to hunstanton for the evening, I thought are you mad, the traffic will be crazy and by the time we get there it will be gone 6.30ish and everywhere will be closing, but he was adamant, he said we're going to see the sunset so I quickly got changed and off we went. It turned out to be the best evening, it was so beautiful and yes the traffic was mayhem but it was so worth it! I love how spontaneous James is, I'm such a planner, I have to organise everything in advance but James lives for the moment and I feel we balance each other out well, he is slowly making me realise that sometimes the best things in life are the ones that you just let happen and not try to control.

We also spent our first few days away this year, we stayed at this lovely hotel on the outskirts of Norwich and we spent a beautiful day in Cromer, and then a not so nice day (wind and rain) in Great Yarmouth  but we found a stylish pub and played some pool which was nice and the drive back to the hotel was an adventure trying to get through the flooded back roads in his little corsa. I think we rerouted the sat nav at least 3 times haha.

And not to mention all the cinema and dinner dates, it's been such a lovely year and I'm so happy I have found someone who gets me and takes me for how I am and my crazy little ways, he's a trooper for sure.

I can't wait to spend the next year with you James, I'm looking forward to seeing where it takes us!

February

You never guess what I did .....I finally started my driving lessons again, after 5 years of putting them off after such a horrible experience I took the plunge and reached out to someone who was recommended to me by my sister, the first few lessons I was soooo nervous and It probably took me a good few months to finally feel settled but even now just before a lesson I still feel slightly anxious, but once i'm in the car i'm fine :D and dare I say it....I actually am starting to enjoy driving. I passed my theory test on 15 November and can't wait to pass my practical and drive wherever I want whenever I want.

March

This month I found out I was going to become an auntie!!!! I wasn't completely shocked as I knew Abi and Lee had spoke about having kids and how badly they wanted them but I did think it was going to be a few months later on but needless to say I was over the moon and so excited, I just can't quite fathom how quickly her pregnancy went, and as always Abi was bewildering in how she managed it, she seemed to sail through it with ease considering she was doing 13 hours shifts back to back  in 30 degree heat on some days to make up her nursing hours towards her degree, she is literally my hero I've never met anyone so strong minded and determined in life as she is.

April

I won the grand national....I chose 3 horses and they came 1st, 2nd and 5th!!! A small win but nevertheless still a win and i think the first time I've ever won anything on the grand national!

May

Dubrovnik!!!! My dad and step mum treated me to a trip to Croatia - Dubrovnik for 5 days for my birthday present and it is the most beautiful place I have ever visited! It's the first place I've been to in which the currency was different to gbp or euros so that was an experience. It is probably my most favourite place I've been to even though it was verrrry expensive and crazy busy because of the cruise ships, I'm so glad I got the privilege of visiting such a wonderful country, Thank you Dad and Wendy, best birthday present ever!!

September

In September I got to see my darling sister graduate and it was such an honor to observe. She looked stunning in her gown and I cried like a baby when I first saw her in it. I was just so proud I can't even put into words how much so. The amount of work she has put into her degree has paid off and I always knew she was going to do well. Well done Abi, you're my shining star.

December

On the 5th Dec my gorgeous Nephew George was born and what a bundle of cuteness he is, I have never seen anything so perfect and I can't stop staring at him, he is adorable and Abi makes such a natural mother she is doing so well.




In December I also applied for a team leader position at the Holbeach store. Not going to lie I didn't think I had a chance of getting it, but I was amazed to find out that the manager there thought I was the strongest candidate and after meeting for an interview he phoned up my boss and told her I was just the sort of person he wanted and when can I start. I was overwhelmed. I'm so happy and excited, but part of me is really nervous and dubious, it's going to be a challenge and a big change, I'm coming out of my comfort zone and leaving such an amazing team of people who have grown not only to be my friends but almost like family. I know deep down I am ready for this move and I have grown in confidence so much in the last 2 years and things can only get better for me but of course it will take some adjusting, meeting new people and dealing with a new job role will be difficult but it's an exciting opportunity to face and see where it takes me.

So here's to the new year, a new job, the possibility of passing my driving test, a baby nephew and a gorgeous and supportive man by my side, what more could I want going into 2018.

I wish you all a happy new year and hope it's as good of a year as 2017 has been to me!

Love to you all,
Becky x

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Is This Rape? #Sexontrial Review

Last night BBC 3 showed a program called Is This Rape? Sex On Trial, where a group of young adults were shown a drama in three parts and were asked questions based on what they had seen, with the ultimate question being Is This Rape?
First of all I would just like to say I think the program was brilliant, it gets you thinking about personal experiences, friends, family, and what you vs society would consider to be wrong, it was clear from the very start of the program that a lot of us have mixed views on what is acceptable and what isn't, so if you missed it then I highly recommend watching it on catch up.

Spoilers alert!!!

The drama started out at a house party, where Gemma was partying with her friends, while looking over at Tom pretty much every moment she got. Later on Tom walks in on Gemma and his best friend kissing, he is clearly gutted and shocked, heads back down to the party and starts drinking some more. The party eventually comes to an end when Tom's best friend leaves much to Gemma's disappointment. Gemma believes everyone has left so she makes up a sofa bed in the lounge, but then Tom walks in, Tom had passed out in the kitchen and hadn't realised everyone had left and the party was now over. Gemma is asleep on the bed, while Tom is lying on the sofa, he tries waking Gemma up, telling her he is cold, she sleepily replies "get a blanket" Tom lies and says he's already looked and can't find one, he asks her to budge up so he can get in the bed, she is still half asleep at this point and agrees. Tom tries talking to Gemma but she is clearly not interested and tells him she needs to get some sleep. Tom then starts to kiss Gemma, she eventually wakes up and looks shocked, Tom gets on top of her still kissing her, Gemma lies still doesn't say anything, doesn't move, her arms straight by her side. Tom then unzips his jeans and put's his penis in Gemma's mouth, once again Gemma doesn't move or say anything. The first part of the drama is left there. 

The Boys and Girls are then asked "Did Gemma give consent?" The majority vote was no she didn't give consent. What I found the most interesting part was majority of the boys were quick to claim what Tom did was wrong and that he had raped her, where as a lot of the girls said she was as much to blame as he was because she didn't say no so therefore she was giving consent in a way, or they felt as if she thought I can't be arsed to say no so I'll just get it out the way and do what he wants. I honestly thought it would have been the other way round. 

The second part of the drama starts with Gemma phoning the police, it moves on to her in court being questioned about her allegation, she is made to feel as if she bought this on herself, she mislead Tom by inviting him to the party, flirting and looking over at him, sending him explicit snap chat pictures and is also accused of using him to make his best friend jealous. This is the bit I found to be a foggy area, the group were then asked if they thought "Tom believed he had consent?" Only just over half said Yes, and the rest said No or they weren't sure. It is so hard to know if Tom intentionally knew what he was doing was wrong or if he honestly thought it was ok because she didn't stop him.

The third part of the drama shows Tom being questioned, he is asked if Gemma said she was ok with what happened, and why he thought what he had done was fine, Tom's downfall is when texts he sent are read out in court, he told a friend "Had much better" and "She wasn't that into it but a party is a party" which shows Tom knew Gemma wasn't comfortable with what was happening but he still continued anyway. The final question is asked Is this rape?

The majority of the group came to a conclusion that it was rape. The director then showed that Tom was convicted of Rape and the standard sentence for that is 7 years, this shocked the group as they believed that although what Tom had done was wrong, the punishment was too severe and he shouldn't be classed as a rapist as when you think of a rapist you think of some sort of monster a violent human being and they didn't view Tom in this way, they felt he was just a boy who had made a mistake and had miscommunication with Gemma.  

I must admit this part is what hit home for me. Now I don't ever really talk about this and very few people even know so I'm a little scared to be writing about this, partly because I try to pretend it never happened and partly because it's just something I don't like to remember but I was once in a similar situation as Gemma, however I did say no, on several occasions in fact, but the guy I was with just wouldn't give up and in the end I did just lie there and let him do what he wanted as I felt so uncomfortable, embarrassed and pressured, I felt I had no way of getting out of it, and the more I kept protesting the more determined he seemed to be, so I did think, I'll just let him do what he wants and then he'll leave me alone. The thing is we both were only 15 at the time, we were kids, and for a long time I blamed myself, if I didn't go to his house, if I didn't say certain things I had said, he might of not done what he did, I would go over and over it and think if I did one thing differently that night it might not have happened. I don't know if he believes what he did was wrong but I also now know that I could have done so much to have prevented and stopped it from happening and although I felt ashamed for what had happened I personally couldn't live with myself if he was convicted of rape and sent to prison for 7 years, mainly maybe because we were only kids and wishfully thinking I hope he has grown up a lot now and knows what he did was wrong but also because I think that is just to harsh of a punishment. I think we need a fresh look on things, more education and maybe classes in which if someone is misinformed or misread the signs, instead of being convicted for rape but be shown and taught what they did was wrong and how they should have dealt with the situation differently because I think a lot of people don't even realise what they have done is probably considered as rape or sexual assault or that their partner wasn't feeling it at the time but was too embarrassed to say. Don't get me wrong, rape is a terrible thing, and those who do commit rape knowingly or with intention to do so, they know what they're doing is wrong, and the person has not consented at all then of course lock them up and throw away the key in my eyes. 

On another note I feel as if a lot of girls don't feel strong enough to be able to say no, and whether it's the experience I went through when I was 15 or not I don't know but now I don't ever just "give in" if a guy is trying it on with you and you're not into it or ok with it, it's fine to say no, and if they still don't get the message and won't take your answer literally it's also ok to leave and call anyone who you trust to get out of that situation, you should never be made to feel stuck or as if you have to do something because you promised or gave the impression that's what you wanted, it's alright to change your mind and to make it clear that you've changed your mind. 

Have you seen the program? what are your thought's and opinions on this topic? 

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Lush Lincoln Summer 2015 New Products Exclusive Launch Event.

Well this post will probably be a huge mumble gumble mess because I'm just so excited to tell you all about Lush and their new products that I don't quite know where to begin haha!

I spent last week in Lincoln and while in their Lush store, Lucy and I were told about an exclusive party happening thursday night (06/08/15) to introduce the new products which are coming to the store today! The products coming to the stores are the bestsellers from the huge Oxford Street store in London, if you're like me and a huge lush fan but find it a bit tricky to get to london then this is super exciting because it's a chance for us all to finally try out the products that have been advertised all over our instagrams haha!

Here is a list of the products that have made it to the stores:

• Shower products:
• Yuzu and Cocoa shower cream
• The Comforter shower cream
• Wash That Man Right Out Of My Hair shower gel
• Beautiful shower gel
• Don't Rain On My Parade shower gel
• Orange Roulade shower smoothie
• Blueberry Roulade shower smoothie
• Enzymic Roulade shower smoothie
• Dreamwash Roulade shower smoothie
• Turkish Delight Roulade shower smoothie
• Coconut Scrubby Roulade shower smoothie
• Refresher shower jelly
• 93,000 Miles shower jelly
• Needles and Pines shower jelly
• The Rough with the Smooth body scrub
• Rub Rub Rub body scrub
• Wash You Were Here wash sheet
• Beautiful wash sheet
• Don't Rain On My Parade wash sheet
• Wash That Man Right Out Of My Hair wash sheet
• Candyfloss showder
• Lemon Sherbet showder
• Life's a Beach body scrub powder

• Bath products:
• Milky Bath bubble bar
• Granny Takes A Dip bubble bar
• Pink Flamingo reusable bubble bar
• The Experimenter bath bomb
• Frozen bath bomb
• Yoga Bomb bath bomb
• Intergalactic bath bomb
• Outback Mate soap
• Serendipity soap
• Respect Your Elders soap
• Layer Cake soap
• Maypole soap
• Apandapand soap
• Devil's Nightcap soap

• Body products:
• Salted Coconut hand scrub
• Go Faster Feet foot lotion
• Softy foot lotion
• Love and Light hand cream
• Elbow Grease moisturising bar
• Pumice Power foot soap
• Foot Soak and Fancy Free foot soak
• Twinkle Toes foot powder
• Golden Handshake hot hand mask

• Face products:
• Cup O' Coffee exfoliating mask
• Magical Moringa moisturiser
• Dark Brown colour supplement

That is a whole bunch of new products, to be honest there is so many I didn't even get round to seeing some of them, so another trip may be needed at some point haha!

So we decided to get to Lush Lincoln at 18:15pm just to make sure we got in haha, we were second in the que which was good because it soon got very long.

Once the door's opened everyone pretty much rushed in full of excitement, the staff were so friendly and helpful, it was a great atmosphere, we were greeted with mocktails, I tried the Elderflower one which was based on the new Respect your elders soap and it was rather nice!

I also entered a competition with the prize being a goody bag of the new products.

We went round the shop having a good old gander at the new items, it was so much fun and exciting, getting to smell all the new smells!! A lovely lady gave us all a hand massage with Beautiful shower gel 

It has a very unique smell, I can't even describe it, it's very apricot and citrusy.

Here are some other pictures I took while in the store:

Intergalactic has a very minty smell, it's full of glitter too, so your bath looks so pretty and sparkly!
















Pink Flamingo is a lovely sweet smell, it reminds me of incense burners.

















I think Milky Bath is my favourite scent wise, it smells just like freshly washed bed sheets which have been hanging out in the summer air to dry!

The Experimenter is very different, it doesn't have a traditional Lush smell, it's very smoky, almost like a bomb fire smell, it's definitely a love it or hate it type I think, I love it! I just can't wait to see this bomb in action. Those colours!!














Granny takes a dip is quite a refreshing scent, kind of lemon-ny I'm not sure if I'm a fan of this or not yet.















Yoga Bomb is another amazing smelling bomb, it reminds me a tad like blackberry bomb which happens to be my fav haha!
















I've never really been a lover of soaps, but Outback Mate smells lovely, it's very minty and I reckon quite cooling on the skin on a hot summers day.

I can't even describe the smell of Respect your Elders, it's such a unique smell, but it's a good one, trust me!

Maypole literally smells like a stick of rock which you get from the seaside. It's very sweet with a subtle minty after smell.





As you can imagine I went a little wild in the shop and probably spent more than I should have, but nevertheless it was worth it i'm sure! I will be smelling great for months upon end! Here are some of the products I bought!!

Intergalactic

Frozen

Pink Flamingo

Yoga Bomb

The Experimenter

Granny Takes A Dip

Pumice Power

Golden Handshake

Milky Bath

Outback Mate

Respect Your Elders

I would just like to thank all of the Lincoln staff for making it such a wonderful evening and experience, you did such an amazing job!

Last but not least, have a picture of Lucy and I holding our baskets and fav soaps!

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